Hi, I am hoping to get some insight from you all. I married and lived with my husband for a year, i loved him and cared about him, but through time I realize I was not ever "in love" with him, and knowing that i was still willing to compromise and be with him b/c I thought you could learn to love and be in love with someone over time. I am aware that I "settled" and i thought that he was better than most guys out there and I trusted him. I tried and tried to make it work and it’s a one way effort. We seem to not bring the best out of each other. B4 me, his parents told me he was hard working, diligent, all around nice guy. For some reason, I do not bring that out in him and in response, he brings out the part of me that I have not thought i was capable of, like screaming, cry in my sleep with sleepless nights, trying tactics to get what I want him to do for me, all not nice traits. In the beginning, he has been sweet when he wants to be, accommodating, soft-spoken, good looking, shy and quiet at times, youngest of the family, he is the beta type of male. He has a big issue though which is he loves to play computer games, day and night, and through this he neglects me, chores, doesn’t spend any time with me and plants his butt on the chair all day long. He got laid off and i encouraged him to get a new job which he believes the unemployment benefits pay more and is trying to milk it till it runs dry. It’s difficult for me to understand how someone could want to aim so low in life, and be glorified. He has a lazy tendency and doesn’t do anything till you push him. I have had many sleepless nights b/c he would stay up till 6am in the morning playing computer games and tapping the keyboard. My mom has asked him to help out at her business, however, he would play 48 hours non-stop to make up for the time he worked. I cared about him and i always made sure he had breakfast, lunch, and dinner even if I was not home. However, he is not that caring about my well being. He knows how to say sweet things when the going gets tough and that’s all there is to it, no actions, just words. He knows he has a problem and is addicted yet he doesn’t care. Is my role as a wife to be caretaker for life? I realized that his neglect was pushing me away and I couldn’t take it anymore. He is emotionally challenged and is not capable of loving deep or have deep thoughts. I now realize i did not marry him for the right reasons b/c of self-esteem issue, family and peer pressure, etc. I believe in philiopiety and most of my friends do too, something that my husband takes for granted b/c his parents do everything for him.

His parents pleaded me to stay with him and in this time admit that they spoiled him and never gave him any chores or responsibility. Sometimes i feel that if i stay with him, it may be due to sympathy and I am not sure i will be happy since he is not capable of loving the way I want a guy to love me, and b/c of this reason, I am not able to be in love with him. They also told me he had a gaming addiction since High School which was not made known to me while we were dating for 2 years. for this reason, i feel it was deceitful. I sometimes feel he needs his family back and he should move back home, just to get back on track with his life. Even if I’m not able to be with him as a wife, I still care about him as an individual and want the best for him. I somehow feel that him living with me, he is not being the best he could be and I’m holding him back from his potential. I think i also got attached to his mom and dad, and it was as though i dated them and not him, and did not dig more into him. The thing is he doesn’t like to share anything till it’s too late, I shared with him all the tribulations i have been through b4 we wedded b/c I wanted him know everything about me and not have any surprises.

I have helped him get numerous counseling sessions. He is not willing to get help. He tells me it is pure enjoyment and fun, and is not a form of escape of reality. If it was, I would definitely fight through it with him. However, he has told this is going to be lifestyle.

What is most difficult is that we had a perfect wedding, invited all guests nationally and internationally, perfect pictures, etc. It’s not easy to toss those away. I now learn I was not ready to get married. I also do not want to devastate my family as you know Asian culture places high emphasis on what others think about them.

I will not be making any drastic decisions at the moment such as divorce, however, I want to know the community’s opinion and maybe it will give me some eye opening insight as what I should do. Thank you for reading this.

My 15 year old is moving here to wyoming from Georgia next week. I have been paying child support for her and have no custody over her. Her mother is letting her move in with me because she has been wanting too for a while now. If i go to do a custody change and a modify to child support, how long will it take. The case will be a Georgia case. I doubt her mom will fight cause she is letting her move in with me.

Isn’t it stated in his will that he wanted Katherine, his mom to take care of his 3 kids if anything happened to him? Then Debbie Rowe wanted custody and now Janet Jackson wants custody. I thought it was illegal to go against what is agreed in the will. I don’t think Michael wanted this fight to happen. He wanted his mother to take care of the kids and that’s it. I think people are just looking for money, they don’t seem to care about the kids. What’s next? Madonna wants the kids?

So my parents married for 32 years divorced in April. Basically all of the friendships they had were maintained by my Mother and so now my Dad is pretty much alone. My Husband and I spend time with him (I see him everyday at work) and we used to spend Saturdays over at his house or invite him to ours and usually do something another day throughout the week. My Dad is a great guy but has been going through a depression since he and my Mom split. He is taking new meds that seem to be helping but I worry about him being alone so much. He seems to want to spend everyday with my Husband and I, which would be fine except now it’s hard to get things done around the house and spend time with my Husband. I suggested a support group for divorced men but he didn’t seem to want much to do with that. I don’t mind spending so much time with him, but how do I encourage him to get out and make friends and start doing some things for himself? He’s 54 and a really fun guy, but shy and having a hard time making decisions for himself since not being with my very controlling Mom anymore. Anyone been through this or have any advice?

My father recently passed away, when we received his death certificate, it read divorced although my parents are/were still legally married. We called the mortuary and got it ammended. Then the guardian sent my mom a letter saying that she never told him she was married (not true, cause she complained to me every time she spoke w/ him, saying that guy keeps saying we’re divorced and I keep telling him we’re still married) Then I received a phone call from the guardian saying that my father, who had SEVERE ALZHEIMERS said he was divorced and if my mom disputes it she’ll be in trouble w/ medicaid. FYI she tried to fight for guardianship but couldn’t afford an attorney at the time. I’m wondering what we should do, and why this is happening- I know my grandparents had a lot of assets could and now we’re told that my father had no inheritance, what should we do?
The guardian was my deceased Aunt’s husband. While I would like to get an attorney I have zero available dollars literally.

My boyfriend has a 5 year old daughter that was born in Tennessee. He is listed on the birth certificate as the father. He pays child support and health insurance. Originally he was ordered to have the child every Sunday. He and the mother were never together. He and I have been together for 6 years (since the mom was 2 months pregnant), so the child has known me all her life. However the mother has always been bitter toward both of us. 2 years ago she moved with her parents and his daughter to Pennsylvania. For the last 2 years things have been relatively civil and the mom cooperated to let us get the child for some holidays and some of the summer. Recently, however, there was a fight between me, the mother, my boyfriend, and mom’s new boyfriend. Since then she has threatened that he will never see his child again and that she’s getting a lawyer (although she doesn’t have a case, since the child is not mistreated by us in any way). Immediately following the fight, she stopped censoring what she says about the 2 of us to his child and needless to say, the child is going along with what mommy tells her. She wont call him anymore and when he calls, the daughter yells into the phone that she doesn’t want to talk to him. What should he do at this point? Can he get a new visitation schedule ordered by the court since technically the old one was violated? Will he or the mother be in trouble for not notifying child support or court that she was moving 2 years ago? Any advice regarding what his next move should be is greatly appreciated.
just to specify, he and I have a wonderful relationship with his daughter. She has never reacted this way toward him until after the mother got mad infront of her.

My parents are 60 and preparing to get divorced. They’re sort of separated. My Mom left Dad’s house and came to my town to find work as an in-house babysitter. She’s desperate to "live a little" so she ‘s into dating sites and agreeing to even spend the night at men she barely knows.

She’s not at all the sexy Pamela Anderson type, she’s a modest looking woman who has neglected herself all her life because of my Dad.

Today she asked me on the phone to pick her up tonight from a guy’s place. But when I get to his building, I call her to get out and she tells me she can’t leave, when I insist she tells me she’s ok and she’s staying the night cause she wants to…

She wants to come to my place tomorrow and when I told her i don’t want this stranger to give her a ride to my home address, she just laughed at me. She doesn’t understand that as a 28 y.o daughter, I can’t trust a 50 y.o man that my mom met on the Internet a week ago.

My brother offered to pick her up tomorrow morning from this guy’s flat and my mum still insists that this man bring her to my house with his car.

I believe I have the right not to let a stranger know where I live and I am very worried that my Mom might get herself in risky situations, but she just acts like a rebellious teenager, lying to me and my brother several times.

She is not open to seeing a counsellor or a support group for divorced women, that would help her be more confident and balanced… She just wants to find another boyfriend fast.Another man to depend on. She also has no savings, no place to go except this family she’s a babysitter for and my grandparents house 200 miles away. I live with roommates so I can’t tell her to come live with me on a permanent basis.

If I lived with her I’d be worried about the men she’d bring to the house.

How can I detach myself from my Mom’s crazy dating situation?

I have a son who lives with his mother, and I recently found out that he doesn’t live with his mom. He lives with his aunt and she doesn’t receive the child support money from his mom. So his mom collects the money and does whatever with it. So I was wndering what could happen to his mom?

My husband’s daughter is almost 18. She lives with her mother and she hasn’t even bothered to visit her father in the last 9 years. Her mother is a manipulative, indolent, and jealous woman. So, the girl is planning on going to Columbia University next year but she supposedly doesn’t qualify for financial aid. Does my husband have to pay for her studies? Does he have to keep paying child support? The mom is unemployed.

I am trying to help my mom find a good divorce lawyer in Fort Walton or Destin, FL. Does anyone know of one? My stepfather is a complete jerk and he says my mom will not get the house, the business, or any alimony. My mom is 58 years old and not in good health. I am just trying to protect her. She just wants to keep her house. If anyone knows of a good lawyer in our area please let me know. Thank you.