I’m thinking of taking a course as a Child Visitation Monitor but I’m not sure if there is jobs out there for this. Any input?

Please help long story about this guy I have been talking to for a while and he wants marriage but this is the story.
In 2008 we had a casual fling but still there was a strong friendship still(although I think there were more than just friendship feelings. At the time he wanted kids and I can not have them and his family wanted him to get married and his work visa from u.s.a expired so he had to go back to India and the feelings at that time were not strong enough for us to marry anyway. In 2008 we did everything together went everywhere together. Then when he got back to his country and was still trying to find jobs abroad in any country he kept saying I want you to go with me where ever he went but still did not want marriage. 3 years have passed and he did get married and for the first 10 months of his marriage he still tried to contact me but I refused to talk to him until one day he told me he got separated from his wife so I started talking to him then they got back together and separated twice they are now separated again and will probably divorce. Also in 2008 when he had to leave me he cried a lot I know because I saw it. Now the closeness we had before is not there but still is strong because we always want to talk because we feel so good when we talk to each other. I have told him many times and am very strong about this i will not just marry him for a green card. The feelings I have now are if he stopped talking to me tomorrow I would be disappointed but would not cry or anything.
He said he wants to marry me for a green card but I told him we did not just have friendship feelings before there is no way and he agreed that before in 2008 it was more than those feelings.
Also when I go out to dinner and a movie then he says in a possesive voice WITH WHO? I told him friends are not possesive in this way. Also we went into a virtual room the other day and all these guys tried to flirt with me and he starting to say to the other guys "STAY AWAY FROM MY GIRL"

He knows I will never marry for green card only this is very clear so if he only has friendship feeling why is he so possesive and is it just that he does not want to admit he has those feelings?
Thanks for helping me and please I want a guys point of view
Also if a guy does not want to admit is what would the reason be for a guy thanks for helping

I’m in the early stages of a divorce – his idea. I’ve begged for him to join me in counseling or for us to separate – he won’t, so I am pretty sure he has another agenda. I have been faithful to him and have put up with a LOT of daily interference from his ex including things I have proof of that he doesn’t know about.

Not to mention his lack of supervision and things that his children do that are illegal because of their ages. And the fact that he doles money out to every one – ex (not court ordered) and kids (who live with us) and does not help me with any of my bills.

He does pay the house payment, utilities and most of the groceries (I am very thankful for that), but I bring in groceries too. I had to borrow a car from my parents to drive, when he just bought his daughter a brand new car and is about to buy his son one.

Anyway, I can’t afford a lawyer, so I want to try and go uncontested and gave him a proposal, which gave him all marital assets and a lot of my items that I brought into the marriage almost 4 years ago. I asked for less than ,000, to be moved to my parents and for 1/2 divorce fees. He is saying I am being a golddigger and taking money away from his kids and he wants 1/2 of all expenses he’s paid from the last 4 years of our marriage.

Am I being unfair in what I’m asking in my proposal? What should I do? I cannot afford to retain a lawyer if he contests my proposal. Should I cave in and accept his offer to move me and take my stuff and leave? I would have to file bankruptcy. With the money I could at least pay my bills until I find a job (I lost mine in February when the company I worked for cut 1,500 jobs.). I really don’t want to do that, because I have very good credit, I just owe a lot of money and the ,… would pay my bills for up to a year, etc. until I can find a job. Did I mention I have a lung tumor and have battled cancer for the last year and a half?
To answer WingMan’s question…HE is the one who wanted separate everything. Up until I started dating him, flying back and forth seeing him, doling out gifts to him and his kids as well as money galore to his kids, I was debt free other than what I owed on a college loan and normal monthly housing expenses.

I know, I know…that was STUPID, and boy have I paid for that OVER and OVER, and am STILL paying for those mistakes of doing that! Instead of owing ,000 on college loans now, I owe about ,000 total, and have absolutely NOTHING to show for it but spending almost the last 4 years in hell and about 1 1/2 years prior to that in what I thought was some kind of heaven.

I got divorced when she was 2, and I have had to work 2 and 3 jobs at a time. For the past 2 years I have had a job that has allowed me to spend a lot more time with her. However, every Time she leaves for the weekend or for Christmas or for the summer I feel horrible about missing out on the last 10 years. today she graduated from 6th grade and has gone to her dad’s for the first part of summer. During the graduation they showed slide shows of the kids from when they were in Kindergarten until the present. It was so sweet. All I can think about is how I wasn’t around enough when she was in grade school and i feel horrible and guilty. She is a great kid and we are very close. I don’t want to feel like this. Are there any helpful blogs or support groups out there? Please, no sarcastic comments. I really am hurting.

I’m 21 and dating isn’t hard for me b/c I’m wealthy & can provide security for a girl but a lot of my friends without a good job & money who can’t provide security can’t get dates with girls.

I’ve noticed guys in their thirties with good jobs find girls to date easier & since the girls are older by then they tend to be more sexual. The girls seem more sexual at 30 than 19.

Now that many girls are going to college and getting good jobs, would you sign a prenup? People get divorced all time nowadays, and in the future if I get married and get a divorce, I think it would be fair to get everything that is legally mine.

We have been married for 3 years and thing shave been okay like all marriages. We just went through a financial problem that has threatened to tear us apart.
My wife is upset. Ive not been the perfect hubby neither has she been the perfect wifey.
But we do love each other. We each have our own differences.HALLO, LIKE ALL PEOPLE ON THIS EARTH AND LIKE ALL MARRIAGES.
We are in debt too. We both work and i have gotten two extra jobs.
However wifey wants a trial separation. She wants me to move out for 2 weeks. In that time we are not to see anyone. I asked her what if during that time she got close to anyone, she said she will not? She said she needs a break. I then asked how separating will cure our financial problems with money being split? She said she doesnt know.
She says she doesnt feel in love with me anymore. That im pressuring her( i talk to her now may once every 2 days) cause she doesnt wanna talk, and when i talk im telling her how we can make it if we work together. She doesnt want to hear this. To her this is pressure. She seems angry. She even told me she gets angry seeing me.
So I dont understand how a trial separation is supposed to work heal problems? But she has said she will not see anyone and that there is no one shes talking to right now.
I asked her what if after 2 weeks she wants to extend for another 2 weeks, and another 2 weeks… then what? Then she said we dont have to be separated to see other people. She said its possible to see people even when together, so i should not be afraid of a trial separation, as she is not interested in finding anyone.
I call trial separations what they are " TRIAL DIVORCES".
What do you all think?
MATURE ADVICE PLEASE

my boyfriend and i plan to get married after college before we go into the military together. it’s really the only option if we want to be together but we are so committed to each other, and have a wonderful, amazing, loving relationship.
we love each other so much, and realize that a young marriage can be difficult, especially paired with a stressful military lifestyle

my boyfriend and i were talking about our upcoming junior year, and he mentioned that he really wants to get closer, make our relationship stronger, and just become more emotionally prepared to start a marriage (you can tell how serious he takes this)

we go on a lot of dates, and share a lot of things together, but i was wondering if anyone has any advice to prepare for marriage, strengthen out relationship even more, or even advice for a younger couple starting out.

we basically just want to go into our marriage with a great foundation to build upon.

thank you all for you positive advice, and just take note that no, we are not too young to get married, yes we do have stable jobs and finances set up, yes we love each other, and that we recognize that marriage takes a lot of work and is not easy. all we want is some good advice before we take this huge step.

thank you all!
haha no no we aren’t joining the military in order to be together
we just happen to be both in ROTC so we will be in the military after college

hahaha really?
okkkk again some more clarification
i’m 20 years old, and going to be a junior in college
and we do have our careers in order. a military commitment.
and yes, i realize that it’s not always guaranteed that we’ll be stationed together, and believe me, we’ve done our research on this matter alone.
we plan to participate in the joint domicile program, and we also have other things going for us that increase our chances of being stationed together.
thank you mix4rest! we are actually religious, and my mom has been trying to get me to watch fireproof with my boyfriend! haha

and min, thank you for your honest advice. finances are something we talk about A LOT. what we plan to save, spend, where our priorities are, etc. we’re trying to foresee potential problem areas and avoid them

I’m BROKEN. . Wife wants OUT HELP ….?
We have been married for 3 years and thing shave been okay like all marriages. We just went through a financial problem that has threatened to tear us apart.
My wife is upset. Ive not been the perfect hubby neither has she been the perfect wifey.
But we do love each other. We each have our own differences.HALLO, LIKE ALL PEOPLE ON THIS EARTH AND LIKE ALL MARRIAGES.
We are in debt too. We both work and i have gotten two extra jobs.
However wifey wants a trial separation. She wants me to move out for 2 weeks. In that time we are not to see anyone. I asked her what if during that time she got close to anyone, she said she will not? She said she needs a break. I then asked how separating will cure our financial problems with money being split? She said she doesnt know.
She says she doesnt feel in love with me anymore. That im pressuring her( i talk to her now may once every 2 days) cause she doesnt wanna talk, and when i talk im telling her how we can make it if we work together. She doesnt want to hear this. To her this is pressure. She seems angry. She even told me she gets angry seeing me.
So I dont understand how a trial separation is supposed to work heal problems? But she has said she will not see anyone and that there is no one shes talking to right now.
I asked her what if after 2 weeks she wants to extend for another 2 weeks, and another 2 weeks… then what? Then she said we dont have to be separated to see other people. She said its possible to see people even when together, so i should not be afraid of a trial separation, as she is not interested in finding anyone.
I call trial separations what they are " TRIAL DIVORCES".
What do you all think?
MATURE ADVICE PLEASE

As far as the 2nd question, I believe so. Especially in the age of no-fault divorce with 50% divorce. You can want to preserve a marriage, but a divorce will happen unilaterally by the spouse.

I earn a very high salary as a web application developer, while also doing freelance work as an information technology consultant, and I earn above 100k with the potential to earn more.

When dating, I am focused on marrying somebody with a career and with goals/ambition, an economic equal …….not a mooch that can divorce me and eat my VERY VERY hard-earned salary in a few years. Women apparently have the same view since they generally marry up, with a lot seeking to be supported looking for a provider. Not every single woman of course but a lot.

A lot of people have responded by telling me that if I loved somebody then it doesn’t matter how much money they make, and to not think about money when dating. But women, would you marry somebody who earned equal/little/lot less money then you or even date them, regardless if their personality was perfect and ultra sweet towards you? Or are you only focused on marrying far far up for a rich guy? It seems like the general attitude is that it is OK for women to be conditional in who they love/date when money is involved…….but these same women pressure me to not consider money when looking for somebody, yet I don’t think they would date/marry somebody who makes less then them. If this is true, it’s a double standard. Is it true? Do you think a lot women are conditional to dating men based on salary requirements, while personality is secondary to money?

What is your take on all of this? I will not have a long-term serious relationship with somebody who makes a lot less than me. *It doesn’t matter how beautiful/hot she is, if she is broke*. I know personal examples of very beautiful girls who work low-wage dead-end jobs saying they are waiting for a man to "take care of them". I believe that when men are blinded and clouded by this….then they are the prey & suckers for future alimony/child support payments/assets/pension/retirement/bank account division down the line.