My husband has a habit of finding the prettiest girl he works with and becoming "close friends" with her. This has happend 2x and both have been behind my back. The latest was the worste. It was with a woman we have fought over before. When he started working with her she would flirt with him constantly. He came home with stories of how she would wear his sweatshirts and make sexual comments. It upset me that he wouldn’t tell her off. She invited my husband and I to a bar where she proceded to get tipsy. She told me how much she appreciated my husband and that I should really work on my flaws as a wife(which she specifically listed off). My husband appologised and even offerred to get another job. But why? I don’t trust him any more. We normally have such a great marriage. It seemed like we were best friends. Of course right now I feel very far from him. Ive even considered getting a "close friend" of my own but I know its wrong and I dont think I could bring my self to do it. Advice?

I am 27 and my husband of almost 3 years is 24. we moved from WA to CA 4 years ago and it has been a very hard time for me. He told me when we first started dating that this is where he wanted to be and what his plans were for his career and every thing, but he wanted me to be with him so i moved away from ALL of my family and friends. It was very hard for me because i had never been without my support group, and all i had was my husband. He is very dedicated to his job and we had some really great times, but over the years, my unhappiness and lonliness, along with the sudden death of my father really made me an unhappy person. It became obvious that we had grown into different people, and were wanting different things. My husband just last week told me that the love he feels isn’t what he should feel for a wife. he loves me as a person and his best friend, but we have grown apart as husband and wife. And he also knows that i would be happier being back with my friends and
family, which i would. I haven’t made any close friends down here. My husband has decided that the best thing would be for us to split up before we have kids because we just want different things in life. He said that he will not turn his back on me and that I am his best friend and he is still living at home, just in the other bedroom. In his mind he has already moved on (there is no one else) and our marriage is over. But this is a huge shock to me. I am so scared to not have him in my life every day and have the affection we once had. We truly are best friends and are trying to make this as easy as possible and still get coffee together and joke and stuff. I just feel like someone has died, and although i know that we will still be in each other’s lives, this isn’t how i wanted things to end up. I wanted babies and to grow old with this man.
Has anyone gone thru something similar and can give me something positive? No mean comments please…
I also asked for support, not insults and putdowns.

Alright, so my story needs a lot of detail. And please, I’m looking for thoughtful, long-ish answers, I created this account just for this question haha…

My boyfriend and I have been going for almost 10 months. But the thing is, we’ve gone out before (3 months), but he broke up with me (and this was during the beginning of 2011). But around June, he finally told me that he’d regretted his decision almost ever since he broke up with me. Now, I was going out with another guy at this time, but I broke up with him to be with this guy again. We started going that last summer; it was the summer before we both went off to college. The first three-ish months were great, we were both really happy.

But I guess life got in the way. College got in the way, my jealousy got in the way, my feelings that college was totally not what I had expected got in the way; it caused me to take it out on him and this probably butchered our relationship. My boyfriend is the sweetest guy, and I really mean it. He’s chivalrous and kind, and funny and smart, but he’s also shy and not really talkative. I’m kind of the same way, so our personalities don’t mix well.

Now that I’m back home for summer vacation, I feel like it would be a good time to break it off now that I’m with my close friends again – I really would need their support if we really ended it. The reason why I’m thinking of breaking up with him is because during my year at college, I was probably the most depressed than I have been in my entire life over one person. I didn’t understand why I was feeling this sad/unhappy/emotionally exhausted/crying all the time over such a sweet person. Neither of us were doing anything wrong (and don’t even mention the cheating thing. He would never.), but the year was just…terrible. So I want to breakup really soon, just to save both of us, I get the feeling that he’s not really happy anymore in this relationship, despite him being the one who wanted to start the relationship in the first place. But (and I hate to bring fb into this because it’s such a dumb reason), when I see other girls post on his wall, my heart starts breaking and my resolve to do anything falters, and I know this feeling is just going to worsen after the breakup.

Even though I’m the one breaking it off (and it’s probably only because we’re both really stubborn and don’t want to hurt each other, so I have to take the initiative), I’m still going to be the one who’s hurt more.

Can you guys please help me/give me advice on how to cope with a breakup?

ok, so i went out with this guy for 7 months. we were really close, and he finally broke up with me in april for another girl. i gotta admit, even though shes a bit too hyper and energetic, shes way more fun than me.

i’m 16 btw.

so it was heartbreaking at first, and we still decided to be friends, and we still talked when we saw eachother in the halls and stuff. He wasn’t a jerk and ignored me or anything. it was ok i guess. over the summer i didn’t see him AT ALL… which honestly helped because i got over him for the most part.

i’m in band, so band camp started in august, and i saw him again. we said hi and talked. then later that day he called me and asked to hang out. i accepted. he told me that he was having trouble with his g/f (the one he broke up with me for) and how he thinks shes crazy, and sometimes shes a bitch, and how i never used to be a bitch, and how he misses me and how he still has feelings for me, and how hes thinking of breaking up with her. So i could kind of get wat he was about to do.

he broke up with her the next week and asked to go out with me. Since i was almost all over him, i kind of hesitated. i wasn’t sure. but since our relationship before was so great, i decided to give him a 2nd chance. i mean, he told me he made a mistake and everybody makes mistakes. so yah.

we lasted for only 1 week, and he broke up with me again, and told me that hes rly sorry but he still seems to have feelings for the other girl.

this pissed me off, but we still decided to be friends. but this time… he’s not as close. we started off being close friends, but now he ignores me in the halls at school.

the thing is that when we went back out, i got feelings for him again, despite being over him during the summer. so if it took me 3 whole months of not seeing him at all to get over him, how am i supposed to do it now? i feel terrible. i thought he was rly the one, and the first relationship lasted 7 months!!! i can’t get over him now . i feel horrible. i’m depressed and i can’t focus on my studies. I mean it would at least help if he didn’t ignore me, but he does :’(.

i feel incredibly stupid. ive never felt this way before, and i hate myself for giving him a second chance

how do i get over him once and for all???

PLZ HELP!!!! thanx

I currently live in the mid west, my hubby of ten years decided to have an affair and not once but twice and I have to move on before it gets worse. Anyhow, we are going through the divorce process and we have our first court date in July of this year, anyhow, he said he will fight me with all his being to keep both the boys and to keep us all here for good. Except I have absolutely no family here, all my family lives in Texas, how can I convince a judge to let me relocate so I can have a good support group while I get back on my feet with my two boys. Thanks in advanced, sincerely, and mom of two.
Actually I have no support group close by but one friend left after I became a stay at home mom, people just seem to isolate you.
And no, no support group available anywhere for me, his family is taking sides they live about two hours from here anyway. All my family and close friends are in Texas.

And I am divorcing him.
I have not told him about my intentions yet, he just assumes I will want to move because he knows I have no friends or family here. He has been pretty controlling during our marriage and did not like me to have many friends, he has always isolated us, but I never said anything since I just did not want to start a fight, but enough is enough, I can’t put up with it anymore.
Betty Actually that is what I will do, my parents have a big home with five bedrooms and since its just the two of them, my and my two boys can each get our own room and my mom said she will baby sit the boys so I can go to work and get back in school.
I do have a family lawyer already, but our court date is in July and she and I are trying to work on a plan to try to get the judge to allow us to move, I just wanted to know if anyone else whom has gone through this or is familiar with this can offer good advice, thanks again.

My husband and I have been separated for almost a year, and recently mentioned to a couple close friends that we had decided to divorce. Earlier today we told our son. He told 4 of his closest friends today and their reaction was unsympathetic, like "duh, what did you expect when they’ve been separated so long". He was very hurt.

And right now I’m feeling pretty blue too, for me and for my son. I felt pretty close to my friends and am, frankly, a little shocked about their lack of follow up and concern about how I’m doing; I haven’t rec’d a single call to ask how we’re doing. (Btw, my husband and I have always done our part to support our friends. We routinely drive their children to and from school and camp when they’re busy, take the kids to recreational events, and have them over to play/hang out/spend the night; these children are the same friends my son talked to today. I only mention this because it helps describe the level of commitment we have shown to our friends in their busy lives.)

I’m so disappointed, I feel like finding a new group of friends. But the reality is, I like my friends and would really rather improve these relationships. Any suggestions for how I get some support from my friends? And what is realistic to expect?
We have both been in individual and joint counseling since separating. And my son is also seeing the counselor so he has a neutral adult to talk to. (BTW, we are remaining friends and work together to make decisions that affect our son.) Thanks to everyone who had genuine answers.

I really have a couple questions…

1) Is it Valentine’s Day or Valentines Day?

2) Should one get close friends a little something for Valentine’s Day? Like if they are your best friends in the whole world? Just wondering if anyone does that. I don’t know if I should or not.

I know Valentine’s day is next month, but still. =]
thanks

Long story short.
I was with this person for a long time. I gave them everything.. Cared and loved them so much. They left me. Moved on. Saw myself spending the rest of my life with them, come to find out they are now engaged to someone else after only 5 months and after being with me for 5 years. Now they say they miss me all the time, and wish we could remain ‘close friends.’ Seems a little messed up to me..

I’ve never felt this way before in my life, to give my all to someone just be thrown away and replaced in such a short time.. Although i know everyone experiences break ups, its hard to imagine anyone else feeling this way..

Any advice, or personal experience how to move on..?

Thanks..

Hi,

So, I went on this trip, and this guy and I had this really amazing connection. So after the 2 weeks were up, we tried to keep it going. The only thing is that we live like 6 hours apart (by plane). Our relationship is still going (it’s been about 2 months now), but I kind of want to break up. We really only talk over skype because he lives in Canada and I live in the US. I like him, but I think I’m a bit young to be in such a long distance relationship. I really have no idea how to break up with him but stay really close friends! How would you do this?

Long story short.
I was with this person for a long time. I gave them everything.. Cared and loved them so much. They left me. Moved on. Saw myself spending the rest of my life with them, come to find out they are now engaged to someone else after only 5 months and after being with me for 5 years. Now they say they miss me all the time, and wish we could remain ‘close friends.’ Seems a little messed up to me..

I’ve never felt this way before in my life, to give my all to someone just be thrown away and replaced in such a short time.. Although i know everyone experiences break ups, its hard to imagine anyone else feeling this way..

Any advice, or personal experience how to move on..?

Thanks..